Ben Folds...Evaporated...A Song That I relate To My Eyesight Problem

"Evaporated"

What I've kept with me
And what I've thrown away
And where the hell I've ended up
On this glary random day
Were the things I really cared about
Just left along the way
For being too pent up and proud
Woke up way too late
Feeling hung over and old
And the sun was shining bright
And I walked barefoot down the road
Started thing about my old man
It seems that all men
Wanna get into a car and go
Anywhere
Here I stand--sad & free
I can't cry and I can't see
What I've done
God...What have I done
So don't you know I'm numb, man
No I don't feel a thing at all
Cause its all smiles & business these days
and I am indifferent to the loss
I've faith that there's a soul
whose leading me around
I wonder if she knows
Which way is down...
I poured my heart out
I poured my heart out
it evaporated...see?

Blind man on a canyon's edge
of a Panoramic scene
Or maybe I'm a kite
That's flying high & random
Dangling a string
Or slumped over in a vacant room
Head on a stranger's knee
I'm sure back home
They think I've lost my mind.

My Two Wheels...

Most of our years have flown away

That's, how it played out...in present day

And...We go on alone, with our thoughts

 So...I'll spend my days, on the two wheels, I bought

The questions on what wrong 

are many sided

I've got no answers

There were none... provided

Life, as well, became very heavy, 

When I was small,

A dark cloud that rained, surrounded us all

The cool breeze, rustling trees

Helped my escape, from older one's 

Who couldn't get along

 Back then, I could get on those two wheels and feel the wind

where ever I'd go

And if would rain on me... when I got home

 I'd get on that Schwinn and just go and go

Now the same kind of feeling

Has followed me again

We hold our ground

I stand alone and pretend

No talking, no feeling

I seem to be with strangers 

My fading eyes, have become more of a danger

I wish I could wave my hand 

and help them grin

but I ride these two wheels

 Crush... this inner sorrow... like it was tin

It's a mystery to me

Why this...has become, once again

If  I could write some words

For them, that wouldn't offend

I would say... find two wheels... and take a ride

Feel the breeze 

write a song with the feeling, inside

Sail on that bike

and get away

Follow those clouds

and remember those days

When we were like a family

Smiling and grinning

Not crushing the wishes of the fallen

 for the sake of their own winning

So the feeling of when I was young... has become again

a family broken ..I reflect and pretend

 so I get on that bike, for a lot miles

Chase the breeze and look for smiles

I'm lucky

 I can get away

On my two wheels

Just like back in the day

Tim's...3pt. Challenge...

Basketball,The Beatles & Tim

A Family Long Gone

It was a sorrowful day when this family... had to cut the cord

We weren't on the same page

We weren't... all on board

But you can be sure I have no axe to grind at all

It was circumstance or hit the wall

You can be sure I've been grinding

Till I'm grinding to a halt

We've been holding on hard ...but feelings got sore

Sometimes ...it's worth it, 

But sometimes... you wonder what for

I will miss the times when we were tight

And some of those the days, that felt so right

Although it seems so long ago

We... are gone, gone, gone

It was a good long run

And some day the clouds will clear for us

We all will see it brighter

There will be no regrets ...no not much

It 's all perspective

Some will say

One's death and One's wants

Let us astray

Everyone's journey is a bit different 

We all  want what's best

For the one's we love

But this story doesn't end up

Like other's speak of

  The emotions flared..opinons flew

Our family shattered

No one had the clue

And when we split.. lies were told
We knew the truth
And their shit got old

So we've gone our separate ways

Which isn't too bad

But.. again it's sure not the same

Like the memories we once had

And even those begin to fade and grow cold
And the one we loved
sits in a chair alone

Thinking of you Jean
Take Care...Tim

My Family, My Early Life

THE MOTHER I KNEW, HER NATURE WAS SAD

MY FATHER A MAN WHO ANGERED EASY & ALWAYS SEEMED MAD

I WAS CLOSE TO THEM, THEN,  BUT, AS THE YEARS WENT BY

MOM AND DAD'S LIFE JUST MADE ME WANT TO CRY

 MY BROTHER AND SISTER DIDN'T KNOW THEM LIKE ME

WHAT HAPPENS OVER THE YEARS CAN BREAK A FAMILY TREE

 AND WHEN SHE WAS YOUNG AND STILL HAD SOME JOY

THE TIMES WERE DIFFERENT AND I WAS HER BOY

I CAN REMEMBER WHEN THE TIMES WERE GOOD

AND WE WERE A FAMILY JUST LIKE IT SHOULD

AND WHEN I WAS SMALL...MOM AND DAD WERE MY GLUE

BUT THEY CARRIED A WEIGHT MORE THAN ANYONE KNEW

BACK THEN I JUST WANTED... THINGS TO BE ...RIGHT

BUT SOMETHING CHANGED AND IT WAS A DAILY FIGHT

MOM WASN'T THE SAME AND LOST LIFE'S ENERGY

AND STARTED TAKING THOSE PILLS... THAT TOOK HER FROM ME

AS THE YEARS PASS , MY SIBLINGS WERE BORN

MY MOM GOT WORSE...MY FAMILY WAS TORN

WE WOULD MOVE...IT WAS JUST... HERE & THERE

WITH AN AUNT OR MY GRANDPARENTS CARE

WE WERE ALWAYS WITH SOMEONE'S LOVE

 BUT IT'S NOT THE KIND... OTHERS SPEAK OF

MOM WAS SUFFERING INSIDE, IN A PAINFUL WAY

NO ONE COULD UNDERSTAND AND SHE WAS SENT AWAY

THE SHOCK TREATMENT THEY GAVE... STARTED HER MEMORY LOSS

 INTO A LIVING GRAVE IT WAS A TERRIBLE COST

IF WE ONLY KNEW THE PAIN SHE HAD

WE COULD HAVE SHOWN MORE COMPASSION & NOT TREAT HER SO BAD

AS TIME WENT BY...OUR FAMILY LOST IT'S GLUE

OUR DAD DID HIS BEST.... BUT IT'S NOT THE SAME AS TWO

MY MOM HAD A ROUGH ROAD... TOUGHER THAN YOU OR ME

SHE DESERVED BETTER... SHE NEEDED OUR FAMILY TREE

AT TIMES I WOULD SEE HER ON HER KNEES WHEN SHE PRAYED

TRYING TO DEAL WITH THIS LIFE WE HAD MADE

I CAN PICTURE HER IN THAT LIVING ROOM CHAIR

WITH A BLANK LOOK ON HER FACE... NOT SEEMING TO CARE

LATER MY FATHER WOULD SIT IN THAT SAME SEAT

STRANGLING IT'S ARMS IN MENTAL DEFEAT

AS THE YEAR'S WENT BY, HER MIND BECAME HER PRISON

AND I COULD HAVE DONE MORE... TO BE A BETTER PERSON

BUT ANGER AND ILLNESS  ARE NEVER GOOD FRIENDS

IT'S NOT FOR KID'S...AND THE MESSAGE IT SENDS

WE ALL WISHED... SHE WOULD SOME HOW BECOME WHOLE

AND NOT LOSE HER AGAIN LIKE SOME LOST SOUL

WE WERE ALL BEATEN DOWN... A BIT ON THE INSIDE

JUST HOPING THAT WE WOULDN'T... LOSE OUR OWN MIND

NOTHING EVER IS JUST BLACK AND WHITE

TOO BAD WE WERE  YOUNG & DIDN'T HAVE THE FORESIGHT

TIME GOES BY AND THE CHANGES WERE UP AND DOWN

WE ALL WORE THE SCARS AND SOME INNER FROWN

THE FAMILY WE HAD ...WASN'T LIKE SOME

WE NEVER FELT RIGHT... WITH OUR MOM... COMFORTABLY NUMB

DAD ALWAYS SEEMED BITTER & PASSED HER... A LOT OF BLAME

BUT THIS WAS OUR LIFE AND NOT SOME KIND OF GAME

WE ALL GREW UP AND THE FAMILY KIND OF SPLIT

THE TRUTH REALLY IS ...WE WERE TIRED OF THIS SHIT

WITH ALL REAL EXPERIENCES THAT TASTED SO BAD

 I JUST PRAYED I WOULDN'T TURN OUT... LIKE MY DAD

 ALL THAT I LEARNED, I HOPE. WOULDN'T BE REPEATED

I NEVER WANTED MY KID... TO EVER FEEL CHEATED

THE WAY THINGS TURNED OUT, NO ONE WAS TO BLAME

YOU HAVE TO MAKE THE MOST... OF LIFE'S CRUEL GAME

AND IF MY MOM WERE AROUND... TO BE OUR GLUE

WE...ALL... WOULD HAVE BEEN BETTER FOR IT...JUST LIKE A CHOSEN FEW...

I  LOVE YOU MOM

If I Had Million Dollars

Just One Of My Favorites Of All Time...Listen to...Broken Hearted Savior by Big Head Todd & The Monsters

THE GOD I KNOW

THE GOD, I KNOW, IS ALL IN MY HEAD

THE ONE I TALK TO... WHEN IT'S DARK AND I'M IN BED

HE DOESN'T PUT THE FEAR OR MAKE ME KNEEL

HE JUST HEARS MY HOPES AND HOW I MAY FEEL

 AND WHEN I HURT HE JUST LENDS AN EAR

I DON'T KNOW IF HE IS CLOSE OR IF HE IS THERE

 YOU SEE I DON'T KNOW IF HE REALLY EXISTS

LIKE ALL OF THOSE STORIES WITH ALL OF THEIR TWISTS

I NEVER REALLY FOLLOWED ALL OF THE REST

 I WASN'T GOOD AT THEIR SCHOLARLY TESTS

 I PREFER TO THINK OF HIM AS AN INVISIBLE MAN

THAT'S HOW I RELATE TO THAT SPIRITUAL CLAN

AND WHEN I REFLECT ON WHAT I'VE BECOME

 IT'S NOT BECAUSE OF A GOD...OR WHAT BAD  I HAVE DONE

I DON'T WORRY ABOUT SOME GUY...  DYING FOR MY SINS

OR SOME GROUP TELLING ME... HE IS THE REASON... FOR THE SHAPE I AM IN

I USED TO BELIEVE IN ALL OF THAT STUFF

BUT AS I GOT OLDER, IT SEEMED TO BE MORE THAN ENOUGH

AND HOW DID I COME UPON THIS TRAIN OF THOUGHT?

WAS MY CONSCIENCE RAISED...BY SOME BOOK THAT I BOUGHT

NO I CAN'T SAY...THAY IS REALLY TRUE

IT'S NOTHING THAT WAS STUDIED BY A CHOSEN FEW

I DIDN'T WANT TO FOLLOW SOME KIND OF FAIRY TALE

 JUST TO FIND OUT RELIGION IS BUSINESS AND THE LIES IT UNVEILS

 SO WHAT DO I DO?... IF THERE IS NO GOD 

DO I POUND MY FIST AND SAY HE IS  FRAUD?

CAN I GO ON...IF HE IS NOT THERE?

OF COURSE I CAN...HE IS EVERYWHERE

HE IS ME...HE IS YOU...HE IS THE GUY DOWN THE STREET

 HE IS THE PERSON YOU DON'T KNOW AND NEVER WILL MEET

SO TALK TO YOURSELF...BELIEVE IN NUMBER ONE

I LEARNED THIS FROM YOU, RYAN...MY FORTUNATE SON

My Half Inch of Plastic

My half inch of plastic....Is what I really need

my half inch of plastic...gives  my clarity

my plastic friend makes me feel so much more

my plastic friend is a pain and a chore

the little half inch brought me back to life

the little half inch took away my strife

my half inch  of plastic is a miracle i found

the half inch of plastic is beautiful and round

my plastic friend brought focus to my eyes

This plastic friend covered a doctor's lies

the little half inch is more than you will ever see

 this little half inch just suits me to a tee

Biking On The Iron Horse Trail

What a Loser

Tim Does Seinfeld

James Brown Getting Zen ...Centering His "Chi"

"I Got No Soul"

It Won't Go Away

WHEN I WAKE IN THE MORNING...THERE IS A FEELING I GET

IT WON'T GO AWAY, I TRY, BUT , YOU SEE... I LOST THIS BET

 I  TRUSTED A GUY WITH SOMETHING I NEED

BUT I FOUND OUT THE HARD WAY, AND WHERE IT WOULD LEAD

HE DIDN'T JUST TAKE MY GLASSES, SO, I COULDN'T SEE

HE BURNED MY CORNEA FOR A FIVE GRAND FEE

HE LEFT ME IN WORLD OF DRYNESS AND HAZE

WHERE NOTHING IS CLEAR, NO CLARITY IN MY GAZE

AND WHEN I ASKED WHAT WAS WRONG WITH MY VISION

HE HAD NO CLUE TO WHY... I WAS LEFT IN THIS BLURRED PRISON

YOU SEE ALL THE WAY, HE KNEW, WHAT WAS WRONG WITH MY EYES

MY CORNEA HAD MELTED, HE COVERED HIS STORY WITH  LIES

AS A YEAR AND MORE PASSED I FOUND OUT WHAT WAS WRONG

FROM A TRUE DOCTOR, ONE WHO WOULDN'T STRING ME ALONG

THE NEW GUY HAD  A PLAN WITH ALL OF THE FACTS

WITH A NEW KIND OF LENS THAT WOULD GIVE MY EYES WHAT THEY LACK

NOW THE SPECS THAT I WORE DON'T EVEN WORK

MY EYES HAD MELTED, BY THE MISTAKE OF THIS CARELESS JERK

MY EYES RESPONDED SLOWLY, TO THESE PAINFUL LENS

 IT TOOK NEARLY 6 YEARS FOR MY VISION TO MEND

 I CAN SEE PRETTY WELL WITH A MACRO LENS IN MY SOCKET

BUT IT PAINS ME TO THINK A DOCTOR COULD BLIND,

 AND THEN ROB MY POCKET

I GOT TO GET OVER IT, THAT'S WHAT THEY SAY

BUT I CAN'T TELL YOU HOW IT HURTS, MOST EVERY DAY

I DIDN'T THINK HOW PAINFUL IT COULD BE JUST TRYING TO SEE

 BUT THAT'S WHAT HAPPENS ...WHEN A DOCTOR...LACKS HONESTY

2011 San Francisco Gay Pride Parade

Life- Practice

WHEN I SIT AND REFLECT OR WORK

 ON THE MUNDANE

THERE IS A LIGHT THAT SHINES THROUGH, 

 MY MINDS WINDOW PANE

IT DOESN'T SEEM THAT LONG AGO, IT'S ALMOST LIKE YESTERDAY

WHEN I PLAYED WITH MY SON,

AND WE PRACTICED THOSE  GAMES

WE WOULD HAVE A CATCH,

 OR I WOULD HIT HIM GROUND BALLS

AND SHOOT SOME HOOPS 

AS I HOPED HE WOULD BE HEALTHY & TALL

HE WOULD THROW WITH HIS LEFT 

AS HE LEARNED TO PITCH WELL

 THEN IT WAS DOWN TO THE DIAMOND

 HE WAS A HITTER YOU COULD TELL

WE PRACTICED IN THE RAIN, UNTIL DARK, IN FRONT OF OUR HOME 

CATCHIN' FLY-BALLS AND SHOOTIN' JUMPERS

 IT WAS A ROUTINE THAT WAS OUR OWN

I'M SURE THE NEIGHBORS THOUGHT

 "THAT POOR KID,...THEY ARE CRAZY"

NO, I JUST DIDN'T WANT MY SON

 AT A MALL AND BEING LAZY

PLAYING 27 OUTS OR THE COUNTDOWN 3-2-1

THROWING 3 STRIKES TO "THE THRILL"

... IS SOME OF THE FUN... I HAD WITH YOU SON

GOING DOWN TO THE MAJOR FIELD

 TO WATCH YOUR FRIENDS PLAY

WAS ALWAYS A KICK 

AND HOW WE WOULD SPEND MANY A DAY

THIS WAS SOMETHING SPECIAL, I KNEW WE COULD SHARE 

IT WAS A DAD'S WAY

 OF SHOWING THAT I  CARED

THERE WERE SO MANY LITTLE LEAGUE AND SPORT GAMES

 PRACTICE WAS JUST SOMETHING WE DID

 YEAH, ... AND I WAS TO BLAME

I WANTED YOU TO DO WELL 

AND TO KNOW HOW TO GIVE YOUR BEST 

 IT WAS KIND OF A LIFE LESSON, 

ALMOST YOUR ADULT TEST

AS OUR ONLY KID, YOU TOOK IT WELL 

AND WANTED TO PLEASE YOUR DAD

 EVEN THOUGH THERE WERE TIMES 

WHERE I LOST MY PATIENCE AND SEEMED MAD

AS THE YEARS WENT BY 

AND YOU PLAYED IN HIGH SCHOOL

 YOU TRIED SO HARD, YOU MADE IT A RULE

 AND AS I GLANCE BACK

YOU LOOKED AT THIS GAME,

 A LOT SMARTER THAN I

YOU MADE IT YOUR PASSION,

YOU WOULD WRITE & READ

SOMETHING YOU COULD REALLY APPLY

AND NOW THAT YOU HAVE GROWN

  THERE ARE TIMES WHEN WE DON'T TALK

 AND THAT'S ALRIGHT

 BECAUSE I HAD THE TIME OF MY LIFE 

WITH MY LITTLE JOCK

AND AS I REMEMBER THE TIME THAT HAS GONE

 I HOPE YOUR MEMORIES

 ARE HAPPY ONES

AS WE WENT ALONG

CLICK HERE FOR MY VIDEO ON YOU TUBE ....TENNIS ANYONE?

Coit Tower

Almost Magic

My Mom & Her Family...I still remember

Tim @ the Gym... a Half Court Prayer

Show Me The Money

The Sound Of Music

Tim Gets The Shaft

Risky Tim-ness

I'm glad I didn't jump...Those Hoodoo's can hurt

Where the Buffalo Roam

Harley vs Augie...Our Dogs of War

My Sight, My Trouble

         PUT MY SIGHT IN THE HANDS OF A MAN LIKE YOU

TRUSTED MY EYES THAT SEEMED WEAK TO SOMETHING NEW

IT WILL BE GREAT, DON'T WORRY, ARE THE WORDS I STILL HEAR

THE COUNTLESS TROUBLE WITH MY VISION IS NOW MY BIGGEST FEAR

      I'VE STARED DOWN THE DEVIL AND HAD TO LOOK AWAY

CALLED OUT TO THE ANGELS... NO ONE EVER CAME

LAID DOWN ODD AND EVEN ....DOUBLE ZERO PLAYED

       IT'S ALRIGHT I'M THE LUCKY ONE...AHH...SUCH A FORTUNATE SON

       EVERYDAY I CARRY THIS WEIGHT AND I WONDER WHY?

WHY SOMETHING SOLD, ENDS BLINDING MY EYES

I KNOW THE REASON AND SO DO YOU

THE TREATMENT WAS NOT RIGHT AND THE DOCTOR NOT TRUE

I KINDA OF FEEL SORRY FOR WHO NEVER LEARNS

COVERING UP HIS MISTAKES NEVER SHOWING HIS CONCERN

        THE DOC KNOWS HE GOT AWAY WITH ONE

IT'S SOMETHING HE'LL NEVER BOAST

 IT'S ALRIGHT I'M THE LUCKY ONE, THE FORTUNATE SON, STRONGER THAN MOST

     I WRITE THESE WORDS FOR NO ONE BUT ME

THEY HELP ME DEAL WITH MY PLIGHT...AS FAR AS I CAN SEE

   MY EYES SO DRY, MY VISION SO BLURRED

YOU AND I ARE THE TWO THAT KNOW WHAT OCCURRED

RIGHT NOW I AM JUST A STAT, A PERCENTAGE ON YOUR CHART

ONE WHO WAS BLINDED, A LASER MIS-USED LIKE A DART

YOU DON'T GET IT...YOU CHANGED MY LIFE...

YOU PUT ME THRU HELL 

MY FAMILY & LISA, MY WIFE

I GOTTA GIVE IT TO YOU....YOU GOT AWAY WITH ONE

BUT DON'T FORGET OR WORRY ABOUT ME. I'M THE ONE YOU BLINDED...

THE FORTUNATE SON

Bittersweet by Big Head Todd & The Monsters

I Don't Even Like Michael Jackson

Whiffle Ball

Sweet Caroline with Tim & DMB

Brian Wilson in my Backyard

How to be a Hot Streak Shooter

Random People Say Hello To Clark Zimmerman

Walking In San Francisco

Tim Does The Talking Heads

A Diet Coke & Mentos Experiment

Right Place, Wrong Time

1. 
   

Fast Clean Info-mercial

Me,...on your planet...nice place you have here

Driving on the Moon

Beauty Queen...by Big Head Todd & Tim

Dancing Fool...16 Songs & Old Man Moves

My Everyday

My eyesight is hazy, my thoughts though are clear. I can only pretend, not to shed more tears.

Show Me The Money

Luce...Amsterdam

Luce

Luce...Worth the Wait

Clark Zimmerman's New Scooter

Zion National Park

Bryce Canyon National Park

Bike Riding In San Francisco

Fightin' Authority

Respect Without Aretha

Basketball, The Beatles & Tim

My 3pt Challenge

Risky Tim-ness